I hear myself say it each Full Moon, and unfortunately on many of the Sabbats, "This time, I'll do a wonderful ritual. I'll cleanse and cast and honor and..." But, so many times, after the husband and child units are in bed, after I've done the dishes and straightened and putsied, after I've worked on my crafts, and written in my journal, and written an article or two...well, you get the idea. I look at the clock bleary eyed and hear myself say that same old line: "Next time..."
After months of this, and the ensuing guilt that felt suspiciously... Christian, I decided to take inventory and find out if I really do live my religion or just say I do. What I've found has made me feel a lot better about myself.
When I rise in the morning and look out the window I thank the Goddess for the beautiful land I live on and the woods, trees and the stream that flows behind my little house. Then I walk into my son's room and I feel deep thankfulness, that the Lady has given the care of this little soul into my hands. It is a big job, but when I see the light in his eyes and the smile on his face, I know that I live with the Divine in my home each and every day.
Then we go down stairs and we celebrate the grain harvest with, what else, Cheerios! My son will celebrate that same harvest several times that day, with bread and peanut butter, bread and jelly, bread and ketchup, bread and bread...
As I pass the family altar in the dining room I notice that each piece on it means something to someone in my family. The cups representing the God and Goddess were our wedding cups, there are stones from both of my children who come running to me to put them there each time they find a fascinating new specimen, there are the love notes that my husband leaves for me in the mornings, letting me know that magick is alive and afoot in our marriage. Each piece on that little desk is a reminder that we live each day with our religion.
As I go throughout my day, doing the "normal everyday" things I find that through repetition and familiarity I have weaved my beliefs into my life. I have also (hopefully) shown my children that elaborate ritual and pomp are not necessary to worship what one believes in. I still would like, sometimes to take the time to do a ritual or two, and I have, and I'm sure I will continue to do so. But I am also happy knowing that I am living with the Goddess in my life, essentially, just by being alive.
From the Imbolc 1995 issue of Witch's Brew
Lilith Silverhair's work can also been seen in the 1996 Magical Almanac from Llewellyn Publications - Click here to order
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